Overworked, Burnt Out & Infertile? The Real Reason Women Are Struggling with Fertility with Talie Miller Part 2

Finding Fertility

Overworked, Burnt Out & Infertile? The Real Reason Women Are Struggling with Fertility with Talie Miller Part 2

35:26

 

The Truth About Motherhood, Feminine Energy & Breaking Generational Trauma

Why Modern Women Are Burnt Out, Overworked & Struggling to Get Pregnant

👉 Listen to Part 2 of my conversation with Talie Miller : Overworked, Burnt Out & Infertile? The Real Reason Women Are Struggling with Fertility with Talie Miller Part 2

Hello, Beautiful! Today, we’re diving into a raw, no-BS conversation about something no one really talks about: how modern women have been set up for exhaustion, infertility, and deep dissatisfaction.

You’ve been told you can “have it all.” Career. Family. Independence. The Pinterest-perfect home. The problem? No one told you the price you’d pay for it—burnout, hormone imbalances, relationship struggles, and a fertility crisis that no one seems to be connecting to the real issue.

So let’s get into it. Because if you’re feeling overworked, overwhelmed, and over the expectation that you should be able to do everything, this episode is for you.

How Feminism Set Women Up for Burnout Instead of Freedom

Feminism promised us independence, equality, and empowerment. And in some ways, it delivered. But in the process, it also robbed us of something essential: balance.

Now, before you clutch your pearls, let’s be clear—I’m not saying feminism was all bad. But let’s be honest about what it didn’t do for us:

• It told us we should work like men—while still being primary caregivers.
• It convinced us that making money was more valuable than making a home.
• It made us feel like we had to prove our worth outside of motherhood.
• It led to women out-earning their partners, creating power struggles in relationships.

And what happened? We’re seeing women completely drained, stuck in cycles of overworking, undernourishing, and—yep—struggling with fertility issues at unprecedented levels.

The problem isn’t just medical. It’s emotional. It’s generational. And it’s energetic.

The Motherhood Myth: Why Self-Sacrifice Is NOT the Goal

Let’s talk about the toxic martyr mother narrative.

Society tells women that motherhood means giving up everything—your time, your dreams, your energy—all for your kids. And if you don’t, you’re selfish.

But here’s the truth: self-sacrifice doesn’t make you a better mother. It makes you a burnt-out, resentful one.

You know that whole “put your oxygen mask on first” analogy? It applies here. Because if you’re running on empty, your kids feel that. Your nervous system is their blueprint, and if you’re stuck in survival mode, so are they.

That’s why healing your patterns, your stress, and your emotional baggage before motherhood is one of the most powerful things you can do—not just for your fertility, but for your future children.

Breaking Generational Trauma: Why Your Kids Are Your Mirror

Ever noticed how your child triggers you in ways you didn’t expect? That’s because kids aren’t just cute little mini-mes. They’re mirrors. They reflect back the patterns, wounds, and emotions you haven’t healed yet.

That anger you feel when they won’t listen? That frustration when they push your boundaries? It’s not just them—it’s you.

Your kids will amplify what you haven’t dealt with, whether it’s:

• Unhealed childhood trauma
• Patterns of overwork and burnout
• A belief that your worth is tied to productivity
• Emotional wounds from your own parents

And guess what? If you don’t heal it, they will carry it forward. That’s how generational cycles continue.

But here’s the good news: you have the power to stop the cycle. By recognizing and shifting your own patterns now, you create a new legacy—not one of exhaustion and struggle, but one of alignment, peace, and true fulfillment.

Why Fertility Struggles Are More Than Just a Medical Issue

Now, let’s bring this back to fertility. Because here’s the thing: infertility isn’t just about your hormones, your gut, or your age. It’s about your entire energetic and emotional state.

• Are you constantly in fight-or-flight mode? Your body won’t prioritize reproduction.
• Are you overworking, ignoring your body’s signals? Your fertility will take a hit.
• Are you operating from a place of fear and control? Your energy is blocking the very thing you want.

Your fertility isn’t just about your physical health—it’s about your ability to surrender, trust, and create a foundation that supports life. And that starts way before conception.

So, What’s the Solution? How Do We Fix This?

It’s not about quitting your job and running off to live in a cottage (unless that’s your thing, in which case—go for it). It’s about realigning your life so that it actually supports your body, your mind, and your future family.

Here’s where to start:

✅ Reevaluate your priorities – Is your current lifestyle truly sustainable for your long-term health and happiness?

✅ Heal your patterns – Identify where you’re repeating the same cycles (hello, overworking, perfectionism, control issues).

✅ Stop self-sacrificing – Learn to receive, set boundaries, and prioritize your own well-being.

✅ Trust your body – Fertility is about more than just diet and supplements. It’s about energy, mindset, and emotional balance.

✅ Tune into your intuition – Stop outsourcing your power. You know what’s best for you.

The truth is, you can’t “girlboss” your way into healthy motherhood. You have to slow down, align, and heal. And if you do, not only will your fertility thank you—but so will your future children.

The New Path Forward

Modern motherhood doesn’t have to be about burnout, sacrifice, and trying to do everything alone. It can be about balance, about trust, and about breaking free from the outdated systems that have kept women stuck.

This episode is your permission slip to stop doing motherhood and fertility the way society told you to—and start doing it in a way that actually works for you.

Because if there’s one thing we know for sure, it’s this: the more you heal, the better life gets—not just for you, but for the next generation.

P.S. If you loved this episode, don’t forget to leave a review on the podcast. It’s the best way to help other women find this work—and I’d be forever grateful.

👉 Listen to Part 1 of my conversation with Talie Miller : Is Your Infertility & IVF Journey Just Another Way You're Feeding Your Addiction to Busyness? 

👉 Listen to Part 2 of my conversation with Talie Miller : Overworked, Burnt Out & Infertile? The Real Reason Women Are Struggling with Fertility with Talie Miller Part 2

Connect with Talie Miller: 

https://taliemiller.com/ 

https://www.instagram.com/taliemiller 

https://substack.com/@taliemiller 

Is this all there is?: Awaken to a Deeper Life off of Amazon: https://amzn.to/4hty8ja

Let's Do This Together 💚 Monica

🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple || Stitcher || Spotify || Google

Full Transcript: 

00:00
Hello beautiful and welcome to the Finding Fertility podcast.

00:10
I'm Monica, your mentor in uncovering the hidden layers of your fertility journey. Together, we'll discover the right path for you within the six essential steps to creating the family of your dreams. We'll ditch the overwhelm, tune into your intuition, and build a vibrant foundation for your fertility. Whether it's through gut health, subconscious healing, or energetic alignment, you can unlock your body's natural power to get and stay pregnant.

00:37
Your fertility journey is all about radical responsibility and deeply believing that your body is on your side. It's time to stay consistent, embrace trust, surrender, and create the transformation you deserve.

00:51
Finding fertility does not diagnose, prescribe, or treat any fertility issues. What we do is empower you to take control of your health by uncovering the root causes holding you back. Let's do this together. Happy Friday, y'all. Welcome back to another episode of Finding Fertility. I'm your host, Monica Cox, and I am so honored you are here becoming the conscious mama you were born to be. Today, we have the second half of my interview with my mentor, Tali Miller.

01:21
Um, we cut it off at such a, an amazing point in the conversation that I think is very, very over missed. And even I didn't realize this until the last probably year, maybe two years of my own journey of motherhood of, um, how, how important it is basically to have your, you know, your

01:50
your shit together as much as possible, right? We're not looking for perfection here, but having just a high level of awareness to be able to have the skills and the right tools in our pockets to usher these other souls. I'm gonna actually link down in the show notes if you've missed it, there's probably like four to five

02:18
podcast episodes that I did with Abigail White talking about quote unquote spirit babies and how they're actually not babies. They are other souls, highly intelligent. They obviously just come down veiled, maybe some like not very veiled, which I believe a lot more are coming that way. And we're here to share our wisdom.

02:43
wisdom and our guidance with them and if we don't even know our own wisdom and we don't aren't even in tune with our own inner guidance, like, it's gonna be a struggle and we're once again just going to pass down that generational quote-unquote trauma or BS or luggage that we carry around until it just is so heavy and we're so sick of it. so the more you unpack now

03:10
the better off you are going to be for your future children and for yourself. You know, this is like, put your oxygen mask on first so you can then therefore support everyone else around you with pure service, pure love, and pure joy, and not be exhausted. So without further to do, let's get to today's episode. If you tune into that, you'll see that the frequency of actually guiding a soul towards their own autonomy.

03:40
is like the highest level mastery position you could have in universal order in this life as a female is to be able to have the opportunity to guide a soul. Not to give your man a baby, not to have, oh, Pinterest pumpkin with my baby. Okay. Not the superficial shit and not having them be a reflection of you. You have to have zero ego and you also can't sacrifice yourself. Yeah.

04:08
Which all of those things, those are all wrapped up in a nice little society box. And that's what we're presented that motherhood is all about. And I mean, I mean, martyrdom, self-sacrifice, you have to give everything up for your children. You have to give everything up for this. Oh, this is some one, probably one of the things that I get dragged for the most. So I give this example of like, so there's plane is plane is crashing. Okay. You, your child, your husband.

04:38
are all in it. One safety mask, one parachute, who do you save? Every time. What does the woman say? Yeah, the child. 100%. 100%. And I'm like, okay, what happens is because you're your creation, what you didn't see by not saving yourself is you actually lost your whole family. When instead if you actually saved yourself and you put the oxygen mask on yourself.

05:06
you see around the corner, there's two other parachutes and you have two. Okay. And then I go, okay. So then you've got two parachutes. Who do you save? What's the answer? Yeah. Yourself and the child. So when I say, I go, okay. So I would save myself and my partner.

05:37
And it was like a no question. Because that aspect of surrender with his leadership, I would not be willing to do life. I would not wanna do life without a partner and raise a child like that. And I would not wanna do life without a partner where we could create something, create different solutions on how to get our child out together. So when I say that, whoa, whoa.

06:06
Just the uncomfortable, like, woof, woof. Just the level of like reflection and how that shakes people up. I was like, that's the type of masculine that you wanna call your man to. You wanna call him that high. And or you wanna call yourself to that level and then bring that in for yourself and know that you're not gonna run out of time. Yeah.

06:31
So if that means that you're dedicated and you're gonna be a vessel and you're totally void of letting go of time and you're gonna be a mama at 50, it means that. But this is also dragged. Girl gets dragged on the intranets. What was another one that you saw? Besides I think women wanna be controlled. I think the other one, it was a while ago, but it's the whole feminist movement, right?

07:01
and how it fucked us. And I've felt this before, well, yeah, like probably for 20 years, I was like, this sucks. Like I don't want to do all of it. Like this is crazy. And what I saw in myself and I see in many women dealing with fertility issues is that having to do it all, right? Just like you felt in your lifetime.

07:30
You literally fucked your fertility. Like your adrenals, your liver, your gut health, your, you know, plituitary, like all of it. And that's what controls the fertility. So it's this whole like, well, just have the baby. And then you go back to work and then you just wonder why you're so disconnected and you're so fucked. And it's because you have to work a 50-hour work week while you're fucking growing another human being, give birth and go back six weeks later.

07:59
Um, it's such a loaded dynamic because I have worked on so many different couples and usually, inevitably it's coming from, depending on the generation, okay. Mostly women in their thirties and forties feel like they have to work or they want to have a career because they don't want to rely on a man because that's what they've been told because they've come from divorced families and they've been utterly, utterly failed by weak masculine men who might give checks, but nothing else. Nothing is more important in a young girl's life than her father.

08:29
She has to be, she has to get recognized. She has to be, it's gonna be the first person she ever falls in love with. And if you're just avoidant alcoholic and a mess, she will recreate that in her relationships. And I see it over and over again, the biggest wound in the mother and the biggest wound in the father will attract each other. And then you're just basically in karmic patterns. You're in karmic relationships, having more karmic babies.

08:55
not transcending the pattern. It's like you literally settled for a level two when you could have just waited and healed and shot up to a completely different level or version of yourself. So we've been told that we need to have careers and we need to make our own money because we don't want to rely on our partners and all that's fine. I totally get that. However, I wonder what would be available for people and women in general if there was some type of, if there was a reassessment of what we

09:24
deemed valuable of how we actually determined our value. Because if we knew that our energy amplifies and our creativity and our visionary capabilities and how we nurture and how we create a home are literally a man's North Star, he is lost, lost without that. Men are clueless. They cannot, they can only entertain themselves with porn and basketball so much.

09:54
Really, they cannot, they need purpose. And that's another reason why women who are wounded will want to give a man a baby because she's gonna give him that level of purpose. But you can't want in that way without that feeling like a manipulation pattern. You kind of constantly have to check your motives. But...

10:17
There's nothing good that came out of girl bossing. Give me one example that has come out of girl bossing that has moved women forward. And you can't argue with me about wanting equality and having a seat at the table with men and wanting to be on the front line and all of this other DEI stuff. It just, it's not moving women forward. And let me tell you something else that's happening too. If you have women being like, oh, again, then all the autonomy over women's bodies and all this stuff, which.

10:46
is like a whole other conversation. I was like, men don't have any autonomy over their bodies when they're drafted. I was like, let's just, come on. They don't have a choice, they have to go because it's duty, it's honor. If there's a burning building, a man knows how to fucking do that. He's gonna go in there. So if you've got women on the front line, innately, instinctually, a man is gonna get confused about what to save first. A friend, do the right thing, kill that, or like protect the female soldiers. It's actually gonna confuse.

11:16
a man's bio-biological instincts when you start having this level of mixed integration under the guise of what? A woman proving that she can do it like a man too. And I go, really? Is OnlyFans doing that for us? Because nothing is sticking it to the man by being, you know, a sex worker. Love that for our collective arc as women. Really love that. Like sex work is empowering. No, it's not. It's not. And I can tell you-

11:44
my history and like having essay in every decade and the women that I've worked with my time in recovery, it is absolutely never going to lead you down a path of like high levels of esteem and worthiness and uh, partner ability. It's going to be a long lonely road of you having all this money in the bank and no self-worth. Yeah. Self-worth at an all-time low. I'm like, cool. So you've sacrificed your energy. You made your seven figures.

12:14
And now you're just gonna, your flex is the apartment that you just bought in Mumbai. You're gonna give that a shot. Or the flex is like, I now live overseas and I'm starting this new company and I'm gonna venture capital that. I'm gonna buy all these multiple businesses. And I go, yeah. And meanwhile, if you look at your Instagram account, all you follow is mothers. Mothers, homesteaders, relationship advice.

12:40
you know, thinking that you want to be a power couple. This is a whole other lie. And I don't think any of that is bad. I'm just saying that I, in the work that I do, I don't think ultimately that's what we really want. I think we want softer lives. And I think we want to come back to a state of balance because we're wildly out of it. We've sacrificed our feminine energy and now we're miserable pretty much, most of the time. And I think too, like women who...

13:10
who want to be moms and want to have the careers, I just cannot articulate to them that you can't have it both. Like you are gonna wildly sacrifice one or the other and it's not a judgment, like whatever, that's, I'm not judging anyone. But now being, you know, my kids are seven and nine now, like I've had to take a radical step back from this girl bossing, from this like archetype that I thought, you know, I watched my mom hustle.

13:40
You know, I have to do that even though I have a man that can take care of me. I was still in this like crazy like, well, if I'm not making money and then I'm sitting there going like, what is the money? What, what more money? What? Like I'm sacrificing my motherhood, something I worked so hard to get. And my heart aches for these women who do finally get pregnant. And they're like, I'm going back to work in six weeks. I'm like devastated. But they're, most of them are the breadwinners. They are. Yeah. That's what I was going to say. I was like,

14:10
because we have the reincarnation cycle, they can't afford now to take time off because they're out earning their partners because we've emasculated men so much to the point where they are inferior in every way. How convenient for us to be more in control of everything in our lives, right? To the fact that we out earn our partners. And that was my archetype, by the way, my mother, my sister, both out earn their partners. And I grew up with that. I grew up with...

14:39
basically finding men that were under me so I felt safer in some way. And men will measure their power to the level of what they make and how much their esteem is and their drive. And it's hormonally, they are hormonally hardwired to recycle their hormones and dump them every 12 hours. They are hardwired to drive and work on 17 hour days. They're hardwired for that. Women are not. We are not hardwired for that. And our hormones are a mess. Just look at...

15:07
look at hormone therapy, having all of a sudden a resurgence in the medical zeitgeist because women are coming off of the depression in the 50s. We realized we were medicated for the wrong reason and that we just basically had ovaries that were retiring and our hormones weren't crazy and we needed to change our diet. So that whole wave is happening now. Oh, you're not crazy. Yeah, you had your career, but it's really just hormones. So get on these, either shoot pellets in your ass or eat 150.

15:35
grams of protein a day and you'll be fine. And by the way, you're gonna stay a size six, keep the house in order, make out earn your partner, have your babies witnessing you not being available for them and then the cycle continues. And you've missed it all. You've missed all the good years. So my response is usually to this, like there are decisions to make to downsize when you are aligned with your priority. I wonder what would happen if you actually empowered your partner to step up in a different way.

16:05
and you guys downsize a bit in order for you to be more emotionally available and there for the child. Because if you look at statistically the jobs that women have in the United States, what are they? Secretaries, okay, executive assistants, nurses, okay, caretakers. Teachers. Teachers, okay. So we're educating other people's children. We're taking care of other people's children.

16:34
and we're nurturing other people's families but our own. Tell me how that makes sense. Yet you think motherhood is an issue? I just can't be a mom. I go, baby, you a mom to every single one of your clients and your family's suffering. Like keep it in house. Like in house. With community, right? And that's what's completely lost.

16:57
In regards, what I tell my clients now, what I've seen, obviously, with your help and what you're doing, is I tell people, when you come to a fertility journey, you're literally going to run the same patterns you've been running for the last decade. So if you can identify those patterns now, they're not going to switch off when you become a mom. You are going to run the same shit. And do you believe, or have you seen that those, this is my personal experience,

17:27
your children, especially the ones who get more of your genetics, are there to trigger the shits out of you, to kind of see like, hey, these are the same patterns or these are the emotions. Like, for example, I started understanding that there was something inside of me that wasn't right. I had the dream, right? And my kid was like crying over like a red popsicle. He didn't get a blue one.

17:57
punched him in the face, consciousness enough to know this feeling wasn't right. And then I started unpacking it. But with your pattern recognition and what you do, where do you think most people start to recognize their patterns? Catalysing moments, okay, when they're in enough pain. And I have a lot of people come to me when they're having a tough time with their kids or their kids have issues.

18:26
So this is a really good example. So we repeat what we don't repair. Classic depth psychology line, right? If you're taking the same principle, if you're the latest rendition of your family lineage and you understand that transgenerational epigenetic inheritance is a thing and that's a hard science fact that at least 14, 15 generations are passed down through your DNA that you could be running PTSD from five generations ago. Like that's hard science fact, right? So where's the logic that your kids aren't the latest rendition of that?

18:56
So whatever you don't repair, they're going to have to pick up the slack for that. And that's why kids are fucking amazing. That's why I say, I'm like, man, you're going to get the depth and the expansion through how big your container is for receiving and how much you can really, really learn and interact with and how present you can be with your kids. Children need presence. They don't need stuff. And the more we can

19:24
tune into that the better off. So people will get into enough pain when they are physically ill, right? Something terrible befalls them. They're willing to start looking at stuff in a different way when they run into a catalyzing event. Someone dies in the family, there's a divorce, a sudden death, right? Either a family member, something happens to them, something happens to their immediate family, a partner or a child, or they have ongoing issues with the child. Kids who are being born with slight...

19:52
autism or unprocessed gifting or all these different heavy metal detoxes or toxicities and food allergies and all these other things, learning disabilities, dyslexia, I mean, you can go on and on and on, right? We wake up when our kids are starting to feel the effect of shit. And then when we run into dead ends with the Western medical of it all, and then we start seeking alternative therapies like my sister did with my nephew.

20:21
And that's what led her to get her PhD from quantum music university in Hawaii in integrative health. And yeah, when we're in enough pain, we're willing to change. The problem is I think most people are trepidatious about where to go to change. They kind of know that the talk therapy thing is going to be a long road. They're desperate to have immediacy. And if I can get people into understanding the mechanics and ground the spirituality and ground the science.

20:47
to and support the science to keep the ground spirituality grounded, then we can make big change because they're going to reflect your shit back to you. So are pets. Like you will literally attract the patterns that you're running to help amplify you, confirm the patterns that you're running now and help you change. And children are the best at that. I see so many power dynamics with children and parents, which is just insane to me.

21:12
Um, you're burnt out and you're frustrating. You don't have patients because your nervous system is, is dysregulated. Your nervous system is dysregulated because you've been blown out and running the electrical charges over on overdrive. Right. It's like having an all electric house and you're constantly having to plug everything in at 1% just to keep going. And now imagine having a baby with that, that baby is imprinting on all of that. He's these, these little beings are scanning you and they know the blueprint. Okay. They have.

21:41
blueprint for how this reality works. That's why children early are genius. And then elders, when they're on their way out or closer to are genius because the veils are thin. There's a sense of clarity of just profound levels of wisdom and knowledge, right? Because they see this reality, they're scanning you, they see the incongruencies of that and they're like, this ain't math in, this math ain't math in. And they will call you out.

22:07
And the parents that I see that do this the best are like, you're right, I totally fucked that up. And it's not the rupture because let the ruptures happen. Do not prevent a crises, be messy and allow, bring them into your healing process. It's not the rupture, it's the repair. They want to see what you've learned so they can learn how to have themselves. So the more women love themselves and honor themselves and love up on themselves and just beyond self care because frequency work can be deeply, deeply nourishing because clarity

22:37
is exhilarating. I'm the type of person where if I'm in a crisis, I want clarity, not comfort. I don't need a hug. Sometimes I do, but I just need to be told straight up, like, listen, you're doing amazing. I'm rooting for you, but here's the T. You got to do this, this, this, this, and this. This is the pattern. This is what this is. I respond extremely well to that. When I'm in crisis, the feminine side of me needs my masculine side of me to tell me what's up.

23:04
When I tune into the highest expression of me and I sit in meditation, my highest has a deeply, deeply loving frequency, but she's incredibly direct, but she has very gentle precision. And I find that deeply nourishing for me. So the more access we have to ourselves and the more that we know how to regulate our own emotions, the more our kiddos just are gonna scan that. They don't do what you tell them, they do how you do with yourself. Yeah.

23:33
How you are with yourself is what they replicate. People are like, I don't know why my child is so whatever. I always told them they were X, Y, Z. And I was like, they're not gonna, it's not what you tell them, it's what you say to yourself. They pick that up. Mirror neurons, like monkey see, monkey do kind of shit. It's really a nature-based dynamic. So I mean, my best suggestion through pattern recognition with women who are just stuck and they feel like they can't, it's like a game of whack-a-mole really.

24:02
you know, because maintaining a house and maintaining a flow and kids are going to grow and have tantrums and not know how to regulate themselves, all I have to say is like the more that you honor yourself and the more clarity you get with yourself, the more you're going to see peace in your external life. And that ripples into all generations, family, all of it. A man will rest when he knows his woman is at peace. He will just blossom. And a lot of that has to do with being learning how to self-source.

24:32
and not outsource, not eat shit. Okay, we can't martyr and self-sacrifice anymore. We cannot do that. We have to have boundaries, we have to speak up, we have to call ourselves higher, and we have to collectively heal, especially as women. And when we, as we start to do that, which is happening, we're gonna blow ourselves out for a little while longer, and then we're gonna start to even out, and then, right, and men are gonna start rising up, and it's gonna be great, and women just need to chill.

25:02
If we can chill and stop controlling and work on our nervous systems and not drop our ears, okay? And allow ourselves to be provided for and taken care of and move into that vulnerability and feel more comfortable there, there's a lot available for us. We do not have to work as hard. Believe me, as much as I love what I'm do and I'm deeply, deeply fulfilled in the work that I'm doing and being able to be a reflection for other people, like...

25:31
Partnership and family is a north star. Like do not, don't get yourself like, mama needs to get wifed. Like, you know, like I am here to show you, like show everybody, I was like, look where I came from and look what is possible. Like, let me be the archetype, come with me on this journey and let me tell you that it is possible, you are possible and you are worth it. And we can have it all without sacrificing our bodies and ourself and our emotional energy anymore. We can't do that.

26:01
And I mean, if I've like checked any of those boxes off in my life, I was like, fuck it. I won. I did it. I experienced that. Check. Ding. You know, feeling safe in my body with a man. Check. Right? Like feeling safe in my body, deeply present with my children. Check. Right? Like experiencing the identity of mother of motherhood and being like, wow, this is crazy. Like talk about levels of dimension. Like check. Those things are wins. And I think the more we can lean into these moments of just mundane.

26:29
simplicity like over and over and over again, you just start to expand that presence. And you just don't care about stuff. Like things just take a totally different meaning. Yeah. Go ahead. No, no, go ahead. I was just going to say, I'm convinced now, like everything that I've read, everything that I've done, it's the mundane-ness. Like that's where the magic is. It's the radical responsibility. How are you truly feeling while you're washing the dishes? How are you truly feeling at work?

26:59
If you're not in alignment with it, then fucking change it. Start taking that, you say it too, that contrary action. Contrary action. Yeah, I can't even say the word. It's important. It's important because we can do all the clearing, right? I say this all the time. And you've heard this, right? Like, okay, we've cleared all the set. We've cleared the set at frequency level and how people are doing their clearings and how people are creating the change and the shifts and whatever is totally unique to everybody else. But once that ripples into...

27:27
present time, right, it ripples through into the physical body, you have to confirm delete it. And the confirmed delete looks like contrary action. So if we're working on a self-belief system, okay, through subconscious programs around lack, unworthiness, not feeling good enough, whatever else, settling for less, atrophied self-belief on the paternal line, and it's multiple generations back through, you know, war sacrifices, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. You know, there's all these different mechanisms to track the origin of where these patterns started and how they're affecting you in your life.

27:57
how it's creating a functional freeze, how you constantly self-sabotage, how you have these bursts of like, constantly feeling really amplified and motivated, and then boom, flatlining and just scrolling, because you just can't show up, you can't do it today, or like just putting your kid in front of something to just deal with it, like deal with yourself, kid. Like go in front of the screen right now so I can just have a second, because I'm about ready to lose my mind. So like all of those moments when you can check yourself and you can fit, you know, and we're working on, let's say,

28:26
your relationship with yourself in those high triggering moments, that's the time for you to catch it. That's your opportunity. These are your windows. Okay. Those are those like you're moving through time and there's these little windows where you can literally jump off the moving train and you're like, wait a minute. Okay. What just happened? How did that just happen? Which is like why I try to help people like stop, drop and roll kind of thing. Like when you catch yourself.

28:55
catch it as quickly as you can, no matter where you are, and then immediately get into the investigation and the identification process, the pattern recognition identification process, track it in the body, be with it, and then opposite. Do the opposite. If you tell yourself you're a piece of shit and it's always gonna be like this, you're like, I'm absolutely not giving myself that energy right now. I'm just not doing it. And where is this in the body? How can I take contrary action here? What am I doing? And a lot of it can just be screen change.

29:23
Like, all right, let's actually let's go outside, bud. We're gonna go outside. We're gonna go for a little bit of a walk. We're gonna do something. And you just gotta, you gotta change the scene. And I call it a screen change because we're in a loop at that point. The brain is physically in a loop. It's like Netflix is trying to render a new image and it physically can't. It's stuck at 86. It's freaking out. And you're like, boop, turn it off. Okay, like turn it off, walk out, reset.

29:48
come back in, boom, Netflix is at 100. And then all of a sudden your energy, these are the mundane moments that most people just want to be like, fuck right off. They want to fuck them right off. And so do you think that that's why people who even do your frequency work, right? Like working with you, if they're not doing the work outside of the time together, they're not going to see the results of what you can help support them.

30:13
100%. I mean, I can tell you right now, there are people that come to me who use me as a crisis manager. Tali, I have a really big business meeting coming in and I really want to work on energies of abundance. Like right now, I want to be able to get this job, support my family. I want to get this promotion. And I was like, Oh, I love that for me. I wish I could wave my magic wand and just give you everything that you wanted. I was like, I'm not your crisis manager, bro, but I can tell you, I can work on the fear patterns as to why you think you're not going to be able to get this position because that's why you called me.

30:42
Right? You're just double checking and insuring and getting more insurance of putting you in the highest position. Like I can put you in the highest timeline and the highest possibility. I say that in timeline, meaning the highest possibility probability factor for you. I can connect you with the possibility of you that you're questioning. I can reconnect you in that moment. But if you're not actually doing the work to back that belief system up, it's not going to go anywhere. Yeah.

31:10
Yeah, it's I wish I wish I was a crock pot and you could set it and forget it. I mean, there eventually there is an intention though, people who have that type of mentality typically don't stick around because all of a sudden sessions aren't going to be available because I set very clear parameters with this work in general that I'm not a crutch and I will lovingly set a boundary and tell people that they need to sit with themselves and go to themselves and go to source over me. I'm a guide. And then eventually you're on your own.

31:40
And I think that's the healthiest way because otherwise it just turns into another cult-like guru abuse pattern. And if I'm constantly clearing the same stuff and you're not getting any of the knowledge that I'm enabling, and it's learned helplessness doesn't help anybody. But yeah, you've got to do the work on your own. And most people, I would say like 98% of the people who work with me are very, very accountable over responsible people. You know, I mean, they're just like A type.

32:07
close, you know, students du jour, like, tell me I just learned this, I learned this, I listened to every happy episode, every podcast, I took notes. All right, you're calling me out. You're calling me out. And I'm just like, I am so unbelievably still humbled that I was like, wow, people listen to the podcast. You know what I mean? To the five people who always like my post. Thank you. You know what I mean? Look, that kind of thing. And I was like, I must be doing something right if TikTok banned me. So yeah, well, yeah, I mean, that's all better.

32:37
100%. It's crazy. But yeah, for the most part, I'm not interested in being anybody's learned helplessness guru. And then I just kind of check it because there's a handful of people who have messaged me literally on every single platform, the same question over and over and over again. And I'm just like, okay, boundary. But yeah, you got to do the work, right? You got to carry your own water.

33:06
Absolutely. Thank you so much for your time. I know that you are a busy woman. Please tell our listeners about your book and where they can find you. Yes. So I have a book. It's called Is This All There Is. It is on Amazon. It is on my website as well. You can find me on Substack actively and Instagram at the moment actively right now. I am also on Telegram. I have a Telegram channel. I just don't know how long.

33:34
But the best way is to go to tallymiller.com, please, and follow me and connect with me on social media, again, Instagram and Substack, both at tallymiller and superfreaky. And then I also have a YouTube channel that I'm probably gonna work more actively on. And I have a podcast called Super Freak that's streaming on all platforms also. Yeah, cool. Well, those links will be down in the show notes. Amazing. Thank you, darling. Thank you so much. Yeah, my pleasure. All right, have a good day. This was awesome. Take care. Bye. Cheers. Bye.

34:02
Thank you once again for tuning in and becoming the conscious mama you were born to be. Remember, I wasn't some magical unicorn who stumbled into fertility success. I stayed consistent, I put in the work, and I made it happen. And guess what? You can too, by discovering the right path for you in the six essential steps, including diet, rest and recovery, energetics, awareness, mindset, and surrender.

34:28
you can create the family of your dreams. I know you've already downloaded the amazing free guide but if you're ready to really truly step into real action, make sure you either grab the six steps to boost your embryos or look into Fertile Body for physical support, Fertile Mind for mindset and energetics, and if you want it all that's where dreams the online course comes in.

34:57
Make sure for personal guidance, you can join a community session or book a one-to-one private call. And remember this, transformation happens when you stay committed to yourself. Trust your body, follow your intuition, make it possible. Oh, and if you're still here and you love this podcast, please take some time to leave us a review. It's like literally the only way other people can find this podcast. So help a sister out.