Week 8: Overdoing, Urgency & the Illusion of Running Out of Time During Infertility & IVF
You are not overdoing because you care too much.
You are overdoing because your body believes there is not enough time.
This matters.
Because time pressure does not live in the mind first.
It lives in the nervous system.
A tight chest.
A shallow breath.
A constant sense that stillness is irresponsible.
Most women I work with do not feel ambitious.
They feel chased.
Chased by age.
Chased by timelines.
Chased by the quiet belief that they should already be somewhere else.
So they speed up.
Not because it feels good.
But because slowing down feels dangerous.
Movement creates relief.
Even when it creates nothing else.
This is where fertility burnout hides.
Not in effort.
But in urgency.
The story of being behind is powerful.
It convinces the body that rest is optional.
That care can wait.
That stillness is a luxury.
But urgency is not truth.
It is a sensation.
And when you notice the sensation instead of fighting the story, space appears.
Space between the clock and your worth.
Space between action and safety.
Space to breathe without fixing.
Your body does not need to be rushed into healing.
It needs to feel safe enough to slow.
Your future child will not ask why you waited.
They will feel the regulation you cultivated.
The patterns you released.
The pace you chose differently.
This work is quiet.
It is repetitive.
It is unglamorous.
And it changes everything.
Not by force.
By orientation.
By no longer letting time pressure decide who you need to be.
And when the body realizes it is no longer being chased, something softens.
That softening is not the end.
It is the beginning.
Listen Now: Overdoing, Urgency & the Illusion of Running Out of Time During Infertility & IVF
Week
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Listen up, lovelies: Everything I share about health, diet, or fertility magic is my opinion. Yep, it’s all based on years of trial and error, study, reading, listening, and side-eyeing the nonsense out there. What worked for me might be a jackpot for you—or it might be a total flop. Bodies are weird like that. 🤷♀️
Let’s get one thing straight: I’m not a doctor, nutritionist, dietitian, or any other kind of licensed health wizard. If you need medical advice, run—don’t walk—to an actual qualified professional. Don’t come back here saying Monique told you to eat kale for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, okay?
As for the products I mention, they’re either what I used during my own infertility rollercoaster or what I wish I’d known about back then. No guarantees, no promises, and absolutely no refunds on your hope budget if it doesn’t work out.
Now that we’ve cleared that up, proceed with curiosity and, above all, discernment. You’ve got this. 💪✨
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Full Transcript:
00:00
Hello beautiful and welcome to the Finding Fertility podcast.
00:10
I'm Monica, your mentor in uncovering the hidden layers of your fertility journey. Together, we'll discover the right path for you within the six essential steps to creating the family of your dreams. We'll ditch the overwhelm, tune into your intuition, and build a vibrant foundation for your fertility. Whether it's through gut health, subconscious healing, or energetic alignment, you can unlock your body's natural power to get and stay pregnant.
00:37
Your fertility journey is all about radical responsibility and deeply believing that your body is on your side. It's time to stay consistent, embrace trust, surrender, and create the transformation you deserve. Fighting fertility does not diagnose, prescribe, or treat any fertility issues. What we do is empower you to take control of your health by uncovering the root causes holding you back. Let's do this together. Happy Friday y'all. Welcome back to another episode week.
01:06
Eight, here we are. This is gonna be such an amazing one, especially for everyone who's listening, which is the majority of you who are on a fertility journey. I am so honored you are here with me becoming the conscious mama that you were born to be.
01:25
Week eight is going to build on week seven. Your patterns just didn't happen in your fertility struggle. These things just didn't magically pop up. You were programmed already to run a certain way. Your fertility journey has heightened those patterns. And so when you are someone who has moved through their whole life by overdoing because of worthiness, this pattern becomes sticky and thick because the industry
01:55
and society has told you're behind. You should have had a baby yesterday, whether it be your age or how long you've been trying, your expectations, your timelines, your stories. And so because you feel like you're behind, you are speeding up and overdoing and linking it back to being in control. So this week, I invite you to look.
02:23
at overdoing, especially in your fertility journey, through the lens of time. Because whether you believe it or not, a lot of the overdoing patterns isn't driven by ambition, it's driven by the feeling that there isn't enough time. Not enough time to get it right, not enough time to rest, not enough time before something becomes unavailable for you. Especially when you are wrapped up in the narrative
02:52
that your age matters most, not your cellular health. So the body speeds up. So your patterns speed up, rushing. Stillness feels impossible. It feels indulgent instead of necessary. Overdoing becomes a response to the internal clock that never stops ticking, which is an illusion anyways, for the most part, yes.
03:22
There is biological reasons why women stop having babies at a certain time, but it's not what the industry has made it out to be. And here's why it matters. Most of the time, the urgency isn't coming from reality. It's coming from a story about being behind, about you should have started earlier, that this should have worked earlier. I should have had my kids.
03:48
behind where you thought you'd be, behind where you quote unquote should be, where everyone else seems to be. That story creates pressure. Pressure creates movement and movement feels like progress even when it isn't, especially around medical treatment. So this week isn't disproving the story. It's about noticing what happens in your body
04:17
when the story appears. I want you to notice one moment where you rush without an external reason, where your breath shortens, where your thoughts jump ahead, where slowing down feels irresponsible. And I want you to just feel it, because urgency is a sensation before it's a decision. And when you notice a sensation, you create space around the story without fighting it. So ask yourself, what is the rush?
04:47
You're not wasting time taking care of yourself. Your baby is never ever going to look at you and go, you should have had me earlier. What it will say to you when they're an adult and they understand what you went through and what you did and how you changed their life on a physical, epigenetic level and on a spiritual, mental, emotional level because you dropped all the BS patterns.
05:16
Or you continue to drop all the BS patterns, right? We're not looking for perfection, but you did the work. And when they're an adult and they're around 70 % of their peers who are just sick, emotionally unavailable, struggling at life, they will go, thanks mom, thanks, I see it now. So when you ask yourself, what is the rush? It's not about stopping yourself from making that decision.
05:46
just bring your awareness back to the body. The time pressure will lose its grip when it's no longer running the show. Next week in week nine, we're gonna jump into overdoing as an avoidance of stillness, which I know we've already touched on, but we're gonna go a little bit deeper with that. Sometimes this can feel like you're repeating yourself, Monica, but it's that repetition that you need.
06:14
because I know that you guys have read the books. You have the knowledge, but you're not applying the knowledge because you haven't slowed down long enough to get into this mundane, boring work of letting it be slow, right? It's that whole slow down to speed up. This is what we're doing. So until next week, have a beautiful six days and we'll see you next Friday for week nine.
06:42
Thank you once again for tuning in and becoming the conscious mama you were born to be. Remember, I wasn't some magical unicorn who stumbled into fertility success. I stayed consistent. I put in the work and I made it happen. And guess what? You can too. Remember, this transformation happens when you stay committed to yourself. Trust your body, follow your intuition, make it possible. The links that you need are down below.
07:09
And if you are still here and you absolutely love this podcast, please take some time and leave me a review and help other women like you find this podcast to get the support they need.
